Deja vu is a tough guy

[11:56] stacy: hey
[11:56] deac: yo
[12:06] *** "stacy" signed off at Thu Feb 01 12:06:32 2007.

Lunch is a tough guy

12:28 PM, The office
Stacy and the deac are looking for lunch.

Stacy: Wheh should we gow?
deac: Downstairs. It's cold.
Stacy: Ew Ew Ew, Oi get a free lunch at the deli downstaihs.

12:31 PM, Penn Station
Stacy: Excyooz me. Can I get a half-soup/half-sandwich lunch, po-ah favo-ah?
Man behind the counter: But, of course. Which soup would you like today?
Stacy: How spicy is the Maryland Crab?
Man: Not spicy at all, ma'am.
Stacy: Can I troy it out foist?
(Man hands a sampler cup to Stacy.)
Stacy: Yabba-dabba-dew, this is spicy! I can barely feel moy tongue! Holy bejeezus, it burns, it burns!! What koinda spices didja put in here?
Man: Salt.

Oh, Mickey, you're a tough guy

"Sher's the Luckiest Guy"

A bullet was dodged with finesse
For Sher from the Shire was blessed
To not have to pee
In the doc's dubya-cee
BUT, OH! LOOK! WE HAVE A FRIGGIN' MOUSE IN THE APARTMENT!! THANKS FOR USING UP ALL OUR LUCK, "TEAM PLAYER"!!

Limericks are a tough guy

"Sher from the Shire"

In a hovel of three lived a Sher,
Whose idling days were a blur
Due to the haze
Expelled from his j's
He often di'n't know where he were

And so on and on, daily it went
'Til one day a message was sent
"You are to report
To a neighboring fort,
With a clean bill of health." Oh! Lament!

Frantically, Sher went a-searching
For a potion intended for purging
The crud from his pee
And we'll shortly see
If the potion indeed's really working

iPods in Disguise

Optimus Prime iPod Speakers

Hero of the day

Did you ever know that you're my hero?

n. - a mythological or legendary figure often of divine descent endowed with great strength or ability b : an illustrious warrior c : a man admired for his achievements and noble qualities d : one that shows great courage

P.U. is a tough guy

12:18 p.m.: An oft-mentioned tough guy and co-worker of the deac purchases Manhattan Clam Chowder for lunch.

5:16 p.m.: Excerpted from an e-mail written by the receptionist: "The women's bathroom is experiencing a rather significant leak."

Coincidence? You be the judge.

Peyton is a tough guy

Taking a page from Hugo Chavez, Peyton Manning told the New England Patriots late Sunday night exactly where they should go.

The Deac is a tough guy

The deac is thankful to be alive, after narrowly escaping death early this morning. Seconds after reading this article, Mr. 'ster burst into a fit of laughter that lasted nearly half an hour. Paramedics were called to the scene, and were able subdue the deac. Currently, he is in stable condition, with merely a busted gut.

3rd place is the new 1st

Now that the first Fafarazzi Celebrity Fantasy League (a.k.a. You're a Firecrotch) is complete, the deac has some key observations:

1. The No-Win Zone lived up to its name, finishing in dead last.
2. The Mouth of the South (Yoko), finished an abysmal 6th, though the deac fears that this still will not prevent her from continuing to trash talk in future leagues.
3. It is possible to not check your team after Day 2 and still end up in 2nd place.
4. Conversely, you can check your team on an hourly basis, yet still end up in 4th or 5th.
5. The Commish is a tyrant.
6. 3rd place is the new 1st.

That's the truth. Deal with it.

p.s. K-Fed was an awesome pick.