DC Shoes is a tough guy

The deac is still on vacation, but something has come to his attention - something so tough
and awesome that he had to put down his pina colada and comment.

DC Shoes has released the Jersey City sneaker. If you look closely enough, you'll see they used real bullet holes as shoelace holes. Way to be authentic, DC! The deac and his reader salute you, tough guy!

New Developments are quite a tough guy

'ROIDLANDO

(New York, NY) - In a stunning addendum to the Mitchell Report, it was revealed today that, despite repeated denials, RJ has, in fact, used human growth hormone (HGH). When reached for comment, RJ had this to say: "That'th ridiculouth!"

Though he may vehemently deny these allegations, photographic evidence says otherwise. The Deacon Record leaves it to you to decide!

Integrity is a tough guy

In light of yesterday's Mitchell Report on rampant steroid use in Major League Baseball, the following question must be asked: Who didn't use steroids to bulk up in the '90s?

Answer? These guys:

Here we go again

Another day, another copyright infringer. Where's the deac's check, Panasonic?

To be fair, if they truly were using the deac's tough trademark, those laptops would be fully rugged.

Hangovers are a tough guy

This one goes out to Rob.....

You're Welcome

Separated at Birth?

You say "abroad," I say "God help you" is a tough guy

My Summer Abroad by Dadmondo
9/17/94

I spent this past summer traveling abroad with a bunch of friends. There was Erwin. He's on the track team, and a big health nut. He signed a pledge not to drink before turning 21. He said he hates the taste of alcohol. James was there. He's into older girls. Rolando was there, too. He shaved his head on the trip, saying that having hair was a hassle. "Dude, it's only hair. Who cares?" Ry rounded out our vacation crew. He had just broken up with his girlfriend Beth, so he was kinda down in the dumps. Rolando was a good friend, and spent a lot of time on the trip consoling him. I think that's a friendship that will last a lifetime.

Anyway, on to the exciting highlights of our adventures abroad!

• New Orleans: We started off here, since it's the closest foreign country. They speak mangled French here, but the food and music were great.
• New Mexico: Surprisingly, they spoke English here, and not New Mexican.
• Cancun: I cannot remember a damn thing about this leg of the trip.
• Hawaii: They mistook Erwin for a native.
• Canadia: We finished our globetrotting vacation in far-off Canada. By this time, I was nearly out of money. Luckily, the dollar is much stronger than their money...and I bet it always will be!

That was pretty much the gist of it all.

Cures are a tough guy

The FDA has approved a new fertility drug - Snoop's "Sensual Seduction" video. Guaranteed to get you pregnant.

Great Moments in Drinking

Tuesday, 11/20 - 7 of the 9 participants of the TTL Secret Santa are present at Phebe's in New York City. The Tiongson parents, unfortunately, are not there to draw names. Something about a newborn baby or something. Two proxies are chosen to pick for them. E-mails would be sent the next day to inform Mom & Dad. One of the proxies? Oi think yew know hew!

Wednesday, 11/28 -

Dadmando: hey remind "So-and-So" to tell marissa who she has
Deac: ok

Deac: can you tell marissa whom she has for our secret santa?
"So-and-So": huh?
Deac: didn't you draw for marissa in our TTL secret santa? remember?
"So-and-So": oh shoot
"So-and-So": i forgot who it was
Deac: WOW
"So-and-So": holy!
"So-and-So": i was so drunk that night
"So-and-So": damn
"So-and-So": damn
"So-and-So": can you have everyone email me who they got?
"So-and-So": then i can use process of elimination
"So-and-So": i think i know but if i'm not 100% sure that's not good
Deac: hooey balooey!

The Evolution of Bab Fobipe is a tough guy

Today marks the release of Rob 3.0. To honor the occasion, youretough takes a look back at the evolution of a tough guy.

Rob Beta/Release Candidate

Bug fixing and cycle planning

Rob version 1.0

His parents weren't expecting this.

Rob version 2.0

That's more like it. Sophisticated, charming, toilet-trained.

Rob version 3.0

Bab Fobipe: Mayor of Awesometown with Bionic Eyes and a Beard of Fire

Happy Slapsgiving!

Tough Link of the Day

Hot (flashes).

Personalization is a tough guy

Look, Stacy and Er, they released Internet Explorer 7 just for you guys!!

Welcome to 2003!

Tough Link of the Day

Here's something to fight for.

Japan is a tough guy

Japan increased its technological edge over the U.S. late last week, when Triumph International Japan released its chopstick bra. In related news, Deac International will soon be announcing the cereal bowl bra, designed to provide convenience and comfort when you've run out of milk and the grocery store is closed.

Mickey is a tough guy

Best Friends Forever!

The Truth is Discovered

FORMER SIAMESE TWINS, NOW SEPARATED, INTENT ON USING PRE-OP HATS

Intrigued Stacy + Bored Yoko + BTB bra + camera = AWESOME

Love is in the Hair

Folks, tomorrow's the big day. It's the Wedding/Party of the Year. VIP Deac will be there, but you probably won't. In any case, the deac passes on his best wishes to the Petroc's It couple of 1995.

Eight eyes...one heart

Halloween is a tough guy

Congratulations are in order for Stacy, as she won the office costume contest for her badminton birdie outfit.

"Ew! Ew! Ew! Oi'm a shuttlecock!"

Celebrities are a tough guy

The deac and his coworkers were happy to welcome Nicole Richie to their office today. Her apparent weight gain caused one outspoken bystander to remark, "She's let herself go."

The deac is a tough guy

New York, NY -- After allegedly being caught watching "The Notebook," and seen holding babies at picnics, speculation had started to build that the deac had lost his toughness. All that changed this morning when, at approximately 10:18 a.m., the deac was brutally assaulted by an escalator. Reports say the escalator attacked the 24-year-old, leaving him badly wounded, but still in high spirits. More to come...

WHOA

http://www.24trailer.com/

Whatever

While the deac continues to struggle with blogger's block and apathy, watch this:

Jersey City is a tough guy

The deac didn't know Jersey City was so awesome:

"Whether you head to Jersey City's Central Avenue Shopping District in the Heights or the Afro-American Museum in the Greenville District, the walkway along the Waterfront or the Hudson Mall on the Hackensack Riverfront, you'll find whatever you're looking for in Jersey City... and more than you expect."

"West Side - Ethnically diverse and easily accessible by light rail, the West Side district is the bridge between the Hackensack Riverfront and the rest of the city. People flock to its Shopping District along West Side Avenue and to Lincoln Park, a large expanse of open space fronting the Hackensack River. Lincoln Park is one of the largest public recreational areas in the city, with 11 baseball diamonds, 6 football fields, 18 tennis courts, a swimming pool, a quarter-mile track and a lake used for miniature yacht races and ice skating."

Luckily for you, readers, the deac hired best weak eva to sift through the garbage of Jersey City's PR department and obtain some rejected blurbs. Enjoy...

"West Side Avenue...try not to get jumped."
"Hackensack Riverfront...offering the best views of Newark's cargo ports."
"Duncan Ave...now home to only 3 project buildings!"
"Light Rail...good luck getting off with your wallet."
"Irish Quarter...even WE don't know where this is."
"Glenwood Ave...if you don't know Geoffrey Leigh, you're S.O.L."
"Newport Center Mall...we finally got a Macy's."
"Metro Field...let your children play Little League here again...we swear all the chromium's cleaned up."
"Hudson River Waterfront...see? there are white people in Jersey City."
"The Beacon Condominiums...it hasn't been an insane asylum in over 11 years."
"No, that wasn't a gunshot."
"We aren't #4 in the nation in car theft anymore!"
"Would you rather live in Newark? Didn't think so."

JUST THE TIP!!

ATTENTION! Friday, November 2 - Tribeca Rooftop 7pm

The JTT Federation brings you JUST THE TIPMANIA I

Tag Team Matchup: Sgt. Nasty & Miss Elainabeth vs. The Zep Ets!

20-man Battle Royale for the Heavyweight Championship Belt: scheduled to appear - Junkyard Deac, Book-er T, James "Jimmy" Superfly Snuka, and many more!

(Attendance by invitation only)

Dial-up modems are a tough guy

[11:51] ry: does this have to happen EVERY time?
[11:51] ry: [11:24] stacy: yo
[11:24] *** Auto-response sent to stacy: I am currently away from the computer.
[11:48] ry: yo
[11:50] stacy: yo
[11:50] ry: you yo'd first
[11:51] deac: haha yup
[11:51] deac: check this one out
[11:52] deac: hang...let me find it
[11:53] deac: [12:49] stacy: i'm making fish tonight
[12:49] stacy: come over for dinner
[12:49] deac: ok
[17:27] stacy: ok

[11:53] deac: she answered 4.5 hours later!!
[11:53] ry: haha

Omissions are a tough guy

CNN forgot the most important story highlight: Have boobs.

Wang vs. Byrd is a tough guy

As the deac types, the Yankees are losing 6-1 in the bottom of the 4th, and are 5 innings and 5 runs away from watching their season end. There's only one reason why they're down: Wang. Wang, so hard and powerful during the regular season, has come up limp and ineffectual during the playoffs. It appears the cool fall air has caused Wang to shrivel, his balls no longer sinking like they did from April to September.

By contrast, Byrd, the Indian starting pitcher, has sailed through the first four innings, mowing down the once-mighty Yankee hitters with a combination of spitballs and vaseline. Though Wang and Byrd were evenly matched coming into tonight's game, it seems that Wang just didn't measure up.

Real Talk is a tough guy

Graphical Representation is a tough guy

Pictured above is a bar graph representing a month-by-month breakdown of the number of unique visitors to this awesome blog since May 2006. Thank you, dear readers/seekers of awesome...boob-shaped bar graphs are totally a tough guy.

Woohoo!!!

This afternoon, the deac spotted the normally unadorned statue of Samuel Rea outside his office building draped in an oversized New York Rangers jersey. That can only mean one thing - Douchebag season has returned!

Hubba Hubba

Love those curves.

B-More is a tough guy

"Moy crabs are tew spicy! >itch, itch<"

The Vamoose Caboose successfully returned from Baltimore last night, after a weekend of sheer awesomitude. And, though everyone got crabs this weekend, the deac still thinks it's safe to say that everyone had a great time.

Good Samaritans are a tough guy

"Here, let me get that lint off your sweater."

Hunger is a tough guy

A global shortage of untainted food has resulted in a rash of unusual and barbaric behavior:

Edible Complex

d e a c: what do you think.....
d e a c: baltimore, sunday morning, before we head home:
d e a c: http://www.skateparkofbaltimore.com/main2.html
d e a c: WHOA!
d e a c: WHOA!!
d e a c: oh, it's not built yet
d e a c: oops
best weak eva: nah
best weak eva: cause
best weak eva: i need to minimize injuries a month before the wedding
d e a c: ah true
d e a c: maybe just more crabs then
best weak eva: yeah
best weak eva: lets just fatten up
best weak eva: as long as the crabs are of the eating kind
d e a c: haha yeah...and not the britney kind

It's Ry, bitch (a.k.a. Ry's Cinema Classics)

Because Ry (and only Ry) demanded it...

Class is in Session

The deac's back from his trip to Russia. He hedged his bets with several willing participants. Let's hope he takes the grand prize home. Now that he's returned, it's time for a little schooling. Introducing Cheese 101: Types of Cheese (in order of stink)...

Mozzarella - commonly found on pizza



Cheddar - commonly found on crackers and in sandwiches


Muenster - commonly found at 1313 Mockingbird Lane


Swiss - commonly surrounded by better-tasting cheese and ham


Bleu - commonly found on Buffalo wings


Ry - commonly found watching sunsets


Armando - commonly found on walks by the beach

Prizes are a tough guy

The deac will be logging posts remotely for the next week or so, as he tries to win this contest in Ulyanovsk, Russia. Wish him luck. Any lady wishing to enter with him, please send an e-mail to daddydeac@awesome.com.

Trends are a tough guy

The fall's hottest toy?

HUMAN ACTION FIGURES!

Be the first on your block to get in on the action, with Stork Industries' Fall '07 line:

The Jabbin' Julian


Kung Fu Grip Deck


The M.J. A.J. (Moonwalk sold separately)

Art Hounds are a tough guy

People are always asking the deac, "Deac, you've been taking these art classes. When can we see more of your awesome stuff?" Well, deac's got a piece up in the Rector St. R/W station in downtown NYC. For those of you that can't make the trek, here's a picture of this avant garde masterpiece:

Regret is a tough guy

MAY 29

8 GB iPhone = $599

"In!"


___________________________________________

September 5

8GB iPhone = $399

"F me!"

Guidebooks are a tough guy

The 5 kinds of strippers. Read and learn you something.

Someone's Cinema Classics

Happy Birthday to MJ

The King of Pop is 49 today.

Day 5

(Rol)Ando, the deac, and his sword

When he's not winning championships with the Yankees, the deac's out saving cheerleaders and saving the world. With his trusty friend, (Rol)Ando, the deac darts in and out of the space-time continuum to right wrongs and buy lottery tickets. In one sad instance, however, the forces of evil were too strong for the deac to overcome. For, try as he did, American Idol still debuted in the summer of 2002.

Happy Birthday!!

Deac the Awesome turns 29 today. Celebrate in your own special way.

Part 4: Hideaci Matsui

Part 4 of our 5-part look back takes us to the the present day, a.k.a. the Yankee years.

After making a name for himself in Japan, the deacster was acquired by the Yankees in the winter of 2003 in an attempt to bolster their roster and, let's face it, increase their awesome factor. Batting .299 with 101 HR and 449 RBIs lifetime with the Yanks, and voted American League MTP (Most Tough Player) four years running, perhaps the deac's biggest contribution to the team has been showing Derek Jeter the ropes with the ladies. To wit - Jeter's girlfriends post-2003: Jessica Biel, Jessica Alba, Vanessa Minillo. You're welcome, Cap.

'stache is back, and is once again a tough guy

In what can only be construed as anattempt to steal Birthdaypalooza's thunder, El Stache has made a brief and ill-timed return. This morning, Best Week Eva is purported to have cut himself shaving, thus necessitating the use of a band-aid. Well played, Adolf.

Accident...or publicity stunt? You decide.