Deac in a Box is a tough guy

It's only day two, but the deac's team - the mighty Deac in a Box - is in first place. Mocked at draft time for being a #4 pick overall, K-Fed has already done his part, scoring 1 point for maybe, kinda/sorta, possibly dating someone. Stay tuned for more hard-pounding anal-
ysis as only the deac can bring!

Youreafirecrotch is a tough guy

The Youreafirecrotch Celebrity Fantasy League has begun! The deac's roster currently consists of:

• Rosie O'Donnell
• Madonna
• K-Fed
• Cameron Diaz
• Paul McCartney
• Heather Mills
• Scarlett Johannson
• Kirsten Dunst
• Jude Law

Not bad, if the deac does say so himself.

Christmas: The deleted scenes

Here's a look at the post that didn't make it on Friday:

Ho!.............................Ho!.......................Ho!

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas

From Mr. and Mrs. Deac,

Merry Christmas!

>Cough<

The deac extends a hearty "thank you" to Ry for sharing his thoughts, his dreams, and his germs with the deac last night. Nothing says Merry Christmas like a fever and cough.

Stacy is a tough guy

Back at work for only two days, and already Stacy reminds us of just how tough she is.

A sampling of today's greatest hits:

This-Ketchup-Is-Too-Spicy Stacy: Wanna come ovah fuh dinnah? I got this recipe fuh Spicy Basil Chicken.
Deac: So, you're making basil chicken, huh?

On IM:
Stacy (2:10 pm): yo
Ry (2:10 pm): yo
Stacy (2:41 pm): yo
Ry (2:41 pm): uh, you yo'd first

Round 1 of the playoffs: Tough Guys Win!

Here are the results of this past weekends various bowls:

• Philly Bowl: In a squeaker, fiftyohms narrowly defeated Philly Domination 110-93. Apollo, the god of war, takes the Greasy Cheesesteak and advances to the next round.
  
• Toilet Bowl: Nachooo!!! defeated thee buffalo toahs soundly, in a 123-95 decision. The Golden Plunger goes to Brandon, manager of Team Nachooo!!!!
• Downtown Bowl: In an absolute heartbreaker, Cinderella story square edged out no. 1 seed #30 hates er by a score of 99-98. It doesn't get any closer than this, folks. ONE POINT! ONE POINT!!
  
• The SUPER BOWL: LODAMERCY 183 - THE NO-WIN ZONE 86
  

Welcome to the Semifinals, ladies!

StacyBack

The deac is bringin' Stacy back

After a 16-day hiatus, she has returned from her adventures in Ecuador...and not a moment tew sewn! Ew Ew Ew!

Blowouts are a tough guy

Super Bowl update: With 3 players still left to play, Lodamercy leads the (formerly) surging The No-Spin Zone

157 - 72

Strange.

Holiday Party!

Tonight is the deac's Holiday Party. Sadly, with Ry gone, there will be no more moments like these:

Truly, great moments in drinking

Fantasy Playoffs are a tough guy

With the Dave Meggett vs. Er playoffs set to begin tomorrow, the deacster would like to offer his readers a preview of the upcoming matches:

1. The Downtown Bowl: #30 hates Er vs. square
• The battle of the downtown NYC workers. The Friday lunch crew will be ripped asunder as RJ battles Geoff "Magneto" Leigh for 2/3 line supremacy. These guys put the "special" in special teams.
2. The Philly Bowl: fiftyohms vs. Philly Domination
• It's the Pat's vs. Gino's of Fantasy Football.
  
3. The Toilet Bowl: Nachooooo!!! vs. thee buffalo toahs
• This one's gonna get ugly. The deac prefers not to comment on this
  
4. The SUPER BOWL: Lodamercy vs. The No-Spin Zone
• The deac graciously wishes his opponent the best of luck. (And wishes not to jinx himself this time by talking smack)

Christmas Shopping is a tough guy

What's harder than finding two $50 unisex gifts for a grab bag? Finding this guy a date:

Vomit is a tough guy

Not more than 20 minutes ago, yours tooly - the deac - saw someone vomit in front of him. Right in front of his office building. The deac knows what you're thinking: "Isn't Er out of town, and why was he in front of your building?" Well, you'd be right on both accounts. Said yakker looked to be a thirtysomething female. Why she was falling-down drunk at 7 pm on a Monday, the world will never know.

Safety is a tough guy

As if the cold, windy weather weren't bad enough, look at what's posted on the door directly across the entrance to the deac's office (literally 40 feet from his desk):

The deac ain't running away, though. There's revenue to be recognized for the company before the end of the year!

Still busy

The deac's still wicked busy, so why don't you entertain yourselves by making your own dang captions? The deac'll get you started:

"Heil Antler"

"Please make us tough guys of the day" (Your welcome!)*

The ladies can't keep their clothes on around this Cool Guy

(Left to right: Cool Guy, Stacy, Maribel, Janelle, Jerry, The Shartist Currently Known as Er)

* Yeah, the deac knows "you're" is spelled incorrectly, Sherlock.

Busy as f

Seeing as how the deac's busy with work, and he's sitting atop the "Dave Meggett vs. Er" league, he figures he'll kill two birds in the bush: (1) less work distraction for him AND (2) pseudo-fantasy sports tips. Occupy yourselves with this. Comedy will return tomorrow.

Macaque is a tough guy

As China, continues its genetic experiments (first metioned in a June 6 post on this very blah-g), this time producing dogs that walk on 2 legs...

...an undisclosed scientiest is holding macaque.

The Internet is a tough guy

The deac's having connection problems today. He'll be glad once this internets fad is over. To hell with this series of tubes!

Mistaken Identity is a tough guy

At the My Morning Jacket show last night, a drunken concertgoer was kind enough to alert the deac to the fact that he bears a striking resemblance to Hiro Nakamura from Heroes. If the deac actually were Hiro, he'd go back in time, to the night that guy was conceived, and tell the guy's father to drive a little further down the road and pick a different hooker.